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Monday, February 21, 2011

Letters To God

Good afternoon my fellow 3 followers..lol.  Says I have three followers and they are friends and I don't even believe they read my blogs.  Is anyone out there reading this?...Guess it don't really matter if I am doing this for myself anyways.

So I kept my computer off all day yesterday, another goal.  I haven't done too bad with keeping up with my list.  I went outside the other day and cute Rob and Madi's hair.  And then we got new neighbors.  That worries me a bit because one of the people is a 22 year old male that wants to hang out with Mitch and Madi all the time.  His uncle explained that he has a mind of a 14 year old, cause he was hit by a car at age 5.  But still, it worries me a bit.

Last night I watched a movie with my family, well started a movie with my family and two fell asleep and the other went off to her computer.  So I guess I should say I finished a movie last night called, Letters To God.  This movie made me cry like I have not cried in years.  It is a true story about a little boy who has cancer and writes letters to God everyday.  The mailman picks them up and does good with them.  I wont go into full detail but I do suggest the movie to anyone wanting a heart felt, feel good movie.  It might actually help someone that is struggling with their faith.

So here it is, Monday, President's day and the kids are home.  Not much to actually do today although it is a warm day, but not too sunny.  With my lack of people skills, and well my extreme fear of people, going outside is hard to do for me now with new neighbors.  I liked it before...down here in this valley and nobody was around to bother us.  It has been 2 days now and the new people have asked for everything from buying Mitch's xbox, to asking for our Internet password.  I don't mind helping people out, in fact I enjoy it, but I wont be taken for granted like I did in Florida with my neighbors.  Even though I have a fear of people and don't like them too much, I still want to be liked so I always have a fear of being a bad guy.  I have a hard time saying no...so I had my husband do it..lol.

My fear has gotten so bad that, every time my door gets knocked on, I jump up and run to another room.  WHY IS THAT???  I hate that part of my life.  I was coming out of it when I was working, but now that I have been home helping with my husband, I have gotten back into my fear and this time I am afraid a little worse then before.  People are mean and cruel.  And everything that I went through with my family, I just figure if they can hurt me...anyone can, so I just stay away from everyone.  I don't know if people really understand how much words hurt.  I would like to give them the benefit of the doubt and say, no I don't think they really know, but my mind KNOWS they know what they say. 

I miss people though.  Like I miss my daughter, my husband's family, friends and even my family.  I want to go home for a visit, but I am sooo very scared to do it.  Wanting to see them is completely different then them wanting to see me.  This blog is going in the wrong direction so I am stopping now. 

But I do recommend the movie Letters To God.  It wouldn't hurt anyone to write their prayers down when they feel they need or want to speak with God.  he will place those letters in the right hands =D
Til next time my friends, peace, love and happiness to each and everyone of you!
B

2 comments:

Brandie said...

I'm sorry I don't read your blogs. I guess I'm just not sure how this site works. Why don't they notify us when someone writes? I loooove reading your blogs billi! You make me cry! But it's cause you write from your heart! And some of the things you say hit my heart like it was happening to me right at that very moment. You are such a great writer. You never miss a detail. It's like reading a book! Seriously if you ever wrote a book "The day and the life of Billi Sue", I'd buy it and read it.

I feel like a bad friend for not reading. But I'm trying to make up for it now! lol That's why I didn't ever continue with my Blogger site cause I'd grip and never got a response. I commend you for keeping up with this. I'm glad it's helping you so much. I just get ticked off when I took the time to write and nobody even responds. I swear I keep saying that Facebook needs a "I read that" button. Just to know that people read your stuff is nice! So please forgive me for not writing a comment. I had no idea you were writing. I do adore you Billi and I do so badly want to be one of your friends that you can complain too.

Brandie

Empty Time Bomb said...

Brandie you have nothing to be sorry for. Really. Like I told Glenna, I write to help me. And it is helping me a great deal. There are so many things I have to say and sometimes I just don't know how to word them so I don't write them. But I am getting better.

Thank you for reading them tho. Your right, sometimes it hurts when people don't leave comments, but really, I am ok with it. I basically write to myself. Remembering when... that's one of my favorite things to write about. So many I miss, but yet I have some great stories! Thank you for the compliments. I have thought about writing a book of my life, but I only have stories, no advice.

Don't feel bad. Honestly!!!! Thank you for reading it now, and thank you for the showering of compliments. You are very sweet person Brandie and I am glad I have met you!