When Things Are Just Too Important Not To Write Down

I have a problem inside me that is not visible to the naked eye.  It is a problem that many people have and they have given it many names.  Insomnia, stress, restlessness...I call it insanity.

When I bought my bed, I had to have it because it was the most comfortable, biggest size and most beautiful bed I had ever seen.  That's what I use to see.  Now I see it as a curse, a slab of concrete and a torture device.

I go through my day like any normal person would.  I get up like I slept like a rock, get my children off to school, clean my house, run my errands, cook dinner, help the kids with homework, clean again and then get ready for bed.  When I finish my nice relaxing bath at night, I put on my jammies, brush my teeth, brush my hair and then I stand at my door looking at my enemy and KNOW that I will win this war tonight. 

By the end of my night, my body is tired, it is beat down and it is completely listless.  Nothing can keep me from the sweet release that sleep will give me.  I head into battle with guns blazing.  I have a made bed, I have my drink on the end table, clock turned around my sleeping pills that do no good and a nice book just in case.  I draw down the blanket, fluff my pillow, twirl around, lay down nice and gentle, snuggle in and close my eyes.

By three in the morning I am still awake and now with a head full of everything from bills to Loony Tunes.  How does the mind do it.  It is completely full of useless information that will pop up in the head in a moments notice.  I will think about bills one minute and how we are going to make it into the next month, and the next minute I am remembering watching a stupid movie once with Michael Jordan and Bugs Bunny.  Which in return can only begin me thinking on how the two things are similar that it would make my mind relate the two.  Which then brings me to wondering what on Earth can be wrong with my mind, am I going insane, but then if I go insane who will care for my children, and will they come and see me in the crazy house or forget me.  Would my husband find a new wife they would call mama.  Then on to if my husband ever remarried I will haunt him for the rest of his miserable little pathetic life.  Oh how could I think that way about the man I love so dearly for all the days of my life.  But if he loved me why would he be thinking of remarrying. And so on and so on.  By this time it is now five in the morning and ready to start the day anew by getting up the children for school.
I have so many amusing little stories that go through my mind, and now you know why I call it Insanity.

I know there are so many of you out there that go through the same thing.  Matter of fact you are probably sitting up in your bed right now reading this.  If you are, what little things do you do to help with getting to sleep.  Hey I am crazy and insane for sleep so I am pretty much up to trying anything. =) 

How are you suppose to have dreams for yourself, if you can't get to sleep,
Good day to ya,
B